Happy Heavenly Birthday CJ

Today is my son's birthday...He would be 22 today this is a picture of his 20th birthday. The last birthday we got to celebrate with him. The day before this his daughter was born and over night we had a LOT of snow. I made a big deal about going to see him on his birthday. So we piled in the truck and headed an hour away to the hospital. We took CJ subway and cupcakes.



This is how we celebrate now...its not a celebration at all its a remembering. We went to the Memorial park and put balloons on his grave It was so cold today.



This life is so hard. I don't want to have this life. I want the life I had before that fateful day. I never imagine 22 years ago when I was giving birth this is where I would be now. I will love you always and forever CJ. You were the best son and nothing will ever change that.